Aug 29 2004

[Beauty] Chocolate Box

Connor Reegan looked up from the textbook he was reading as he heard a knock on the door to the lavish apartment he shared with his lover, Troy Vaughan. Troy had been meeting with the owner of a prominent art gallery that was supposed to be hosting his next collection of paintings. When it came to his art, Troy was a complete professional and he’d spend hours arguing about the lighting or arrangements for his showings. The meeting had been scheduled to end half an hour ago. It wasn’t unusual for these meetings to run over, but Connor had hoped Troy would have hurried the meeting. Troy had promised to take him to a movie that evening, and it would be starting in fifteen minutes.

The sight that greeted him when he opened the door shocked Connor out of his thoughts of Troy. A tall man in a stylish black suit greeted him cheerfully. His nametag said ‘Ruby’; Connor guessed it was some type of pseudonym. ‘Ruby’ had red hair trailing almost to the floor in a long ponytail, dark bronze skin, and clear blue eyes that practically sparkled with mirth. All of this was taken in subconsciously by Connor’s mind, his eyes glued instead to the large white feathered wings that protruded from the man’s back.

“Good afternoon!” The man was VERY cheerful, a huge smile plastered across his face. “Are you Connor Reegan?”

Connor nodded dumbly. He’d almost believe that the wings on the man’s back were real if he didn’t know angels weren’t real. The fact that the wings were twitching slightly didn’t help his conviction.

“Excellent! I’m Ruby from the Heavenly Delights Chocolate Company, and we’ve selected you to be one of the very lucky people to sample our new line of original chocolates.” A blue-wrapped box was placed in his limp hands, with a business card attached by a blue ribbon to the package. “Please take the time to sample our chocolates and fill out the short survey on our website. As thanks for participating in our survey, we’ll send you another box of chocolates for free. I can assure you that the chocolates have been quality tested and are perfectly safe for consumption. Thank you and have a nice day.”

Connor blinked as the fast-talking man was suddenly gone. Just… gone. Left on the spot where Ruby had been standing was a single white feather. Picking the feather up, Connor decided not to think about the implications and walked back into the apartment. He untied the business card and glanced at it absently, brushing back blonde-brown bangs that had fallen in his face with his free hand. It listed the company’s title below a picture of two angel wings, with a simple web address centered below the title. The card seemed a little plain for a business, but there was nothing on the back either.

Setting the card aside, he unwrapped the metallic blue paper on the box, impressed with how elegant the box looked. Twelve pieces of assorted chocolates were revealed under the lid, each piece looking delicately crafted.

They looked harmless.

Hesitantly, Connor popped a piece of dark chocolate into his mouth. Chocolate colored eyes opened wide as tastes exploded in his mouth. These were good. Very good. They tasted different from normal chocolates, with a sweet liquid center. It reminded him of honey. A second piece found its way to his mouth, followed by another. Connor couldn’t seem to stop eating them, they were so good.

“Sorry I’m late.” Connor’s beautiful lover rushed in the door, instantly sweeping Connor off his feet and into a long kiss. A low warmth was starting to build in the pit of Connor’s stomach as he shared a passionate kiss with his lover. He pressed himself forward into the kiss, winding his arms around Troy’s neck. Hungrily he accepted Troy’s tongue in his mouth, made it go deeper, moving his own tongue against it. Just when he was moving his arms around to pull up Troy’s tight black t-shirt, Troy set him back on his feet and stepped away with a quick grope of Connor’s ass.

Connor felt dizzy as Troy moved across the room to grab Connor’s coat and toss it at him. “Chocolates?”

Connor nodded absently and licked his lips. His mouth was watering, and he wasn’t sure if it was from Troy’s kiss or from the chocolates he’d eaten. A strange craving was building inside of him, slowly burning out from his center.

Troy hooked his arm through Connor’s and pulled him to the door. “Come on, we’re going to be late for the movie.”

Connor blinked. Movie? Oh, right, he’d almost forgotten, although that seemed silly. He’d been waiting weeks for the movie to come out and had practically begged Troy to take him to it. Hastily, Connor started to follow the older man out the door, noticing with surprise as he pushed away from the counter that he’d already eaten five pieces of chocolate.

Even though it was late October, Connor felt extremely warm when they walked through the normally frigid parking garage. The taste of the chocolates stuck in his mouth, making him lick his lips unconsciously. The craving inside him was growing stronger, like a physical force inside of him expanding from the pit of his stomach. The inside of Troy’s car was unbearably hot and he shed his coat, leaving him in tight black jeans and an overly large blue button-down shirt.

Connor’s head fell onto Troy’s shoulder as they drove and he nuzzled his lover’s shirt. He curled closer to his lover, but the seatbelt held him back. That obstacle was quickly gone and seconds later Connor’s lips found their way to the bare flesh of Troy’s neck. Flicking his tongue between his lips to caress Troy’s neck, he moved until he was sitting mostly on the armrest between the two seats. His hands wandered, one clutching the headrest of Troy’s seat for balance while the other slipped under Troy’s shirt to run over the other man’s stomach. The drive itself was a blur, he was too intent on biting and nibbling at his lover’s neck. They pulled into the parking lot and he was crawling into Troy’s seat as soon as the car stopped, intent on straddling his lover’s larger hips.

Strong hands pushed him back into his seat gently. The blonde man chuckled at him in amusement, his long ponytail swaying as he stepped out of the car. “I didn’t realize you liked giving free shows, love.”

Connor blinked and then looked around, suddenly aware of their location. He blushed as he realized people were staring at them and he hastily got out of the car.

“Sorry.”

Troy’s arm wound around his waist. “You know I don’t mind, I just thought you wanted to see the movie.”

Connor stared at the pavement to hide his blush. Right now the movie was one of the furthest things from his mind. He carried his jacket with him into the movie theater instead of wearing it, but it didn’t do much good. The heat inside of him was increasing. He was starting to feel dizzy and slightly fuzzy. Connor hoped he wasn’t catching a cold. He’d felt fine all morning.

Belatedly he realized that Troy was asking if he wanted a snack. The older man gave him a strange look as he ordered the largest drink on the menu with lots of ice. It was the only thing he could think of that would help cool him down. The movie had already started when they walked in, but thankfully there were two aisle seats left near the entrance. As soon as they were seated, Connor started slurping his drink. It didn’t seem to be helping. The cold liquid left a trail of ice down his throat, but his body still burned relentlessly. He focused his eyes on the screen and tried to catch what was going on in the move.

After sitting there for a minute he realized he hadn’t caught anything happening on the screen. The air around him felt thick, his skin seeming too small for his body. He fidgeted in his seat to get more comfortable, but that didn’t help. His mind refused to pay attention to the screen despite his best efforts, his thoughts revolving instead around the intense craving he felt. His breaths were growing shallower in the thick air. He was nearly panting. He couldn’t breathe properly. His body felt tight, tense, and needy. He wanted something, needed it with his entire being, needed it so badly his entire body was reacting. Troy was watching him out of the corner of his eye with a concerned look, his hand reaching out to touch Connor’s thigh. The light contact sharpened Connor’s attention, though not towards the screen, and he realized something.

He needed sex.

Hastily he pulled his jacket into his lap as he felt himself hardening at the realization. Right now he needed Troy very badly, and he had the feeling that if he waited any longer he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from jumping Troy in the middle of the crowded movie theater. He really was panting now, twitching involuntarily with rising tension.

Carefully, he leaned over to whisper quietly into Troy’s ear, the words coming out strained in an effort to keep his mouth away from Troy’s flesh.

“Troy, I need to go to the bathroom.”

Troy made room for Connor to move past him.

He couldn’t restrain himself as he spoke a second time. Slowly, his tongue ventured out to delicately trace the rim of his boyfriend’s ear. “I need you to come with me.” Connor whispered the words huskily, his eyes half-closing in pleasure as he got closer to what he craved so badly.

His lover smiled and stood. Still holding his coat over his lap, Connor forced himself to follow at a normal pace. For once Troy’s fondness for sex in strange places was working to his advantage. As soon as they hit the hallway, Connor grabbed Troy’s hand and pulled him into the nearest bathroom, very thankful that it was at the back of the theater and therefore empty. He shoved Troy into the back stall. The door was locked with a flick of his wrist before he pressed himself hard against his gorgeous love.

Hands clawed at Troy’s belt while Connor’s mouth hungrily sucked at Troy’s. Before he could get the belt undone he was pushed against the tile wall with his hands pinned on either side of him. He struggled frantically against the hold, desperately needing to feel the other man’s presence most intimately.

“Connor, it’s not that I mind but… are you feeling okay? You’re acting strange.” There was real concern in his lover’s eyes, and it touched the small part of Connor’s mind that was still somewhat lucid.

He shook his head, still trying to press their bodies together even though he knew from experience that he’d never be able to break Troy’s hold. He was so close to what he needed but still so far way and the torment of it made him start to cry.

“No. I’m not. I need… so warm… please help me… I need it.” Connor could barely talk, he was panting so hard with desire. It coursed through him in waves, relentless and unyielding. Fighting it was not an option.

Troy nodded, not sure what was going on but accepting it nonetheless. The painter released Connor’s hands and pulled his lover to him. “We don’t have any lube. It’s going to hurt if we do it here.”

Connor pulled down Troy’s pants almost violently. “Don’t care. Can’t wait.”

He fell to his knees in front of his lover, taking Troy’s hardening shaft into his mouth. Troy’s hands held him steady while his own undid his shoes and pants, pushing them off as much as he could while on his knees. As he pulled his pants down, his own erection popped out, already rock-hard and straining. Judging Troy to be sufficiently wet, he stood and stepped out of his pants and shoes so that he was left in just socks and his loose shirt. Two of Troy’s fingers worked into his mouth and he gave them quick attention as he pulled his lover with him towards the wall. His arms wound tightly around Troy’s neck, hands clenching into fists in the back of his lover’s shirt. With a short jump he wrapped his bare legs around Troy’s waist, bringing their lengths into contact. Connor moaned as Troy’s fingers were removed from his mouth, strong arms hooking under his knees to support him. His shirt was pushed up so that Troy could suck one of his nipples, the cool tiles pressing against his back doing nothing against the fire burning stronger than ever inside him. Loud cries fell from his lips before Troy silenced him with a rough kiss.

“Be quiet or we’ll be caught.”

Connor nodded in compliance, biting his lips to keep back a moan as Troy resumed laving at his chest. Troy’s fingers shoved up and inside Connor, scissoring for a few short seconds before the painter’s still moist member slammed inside of Connor in a movement that brought stars to his eyes from both pleasure and pain. It hurt so badly, but he didn’t care. This was what he wanted and needed. He wouldn’t have it any other way. It wasn’t like him to be this needy, to want sex this much. He should have been able to control himself better, but it was like all his inhibitions had been burned away in the fire that was eating him from the inside. He lusted. He needed. He hurt. He burned. He was being filled and it was the best sex of his life because all he could do was feel and react and pray that he didn’t drown in the tide that was rising over him.

He was screaming without making a sound, his lip bloodied where he was biting it to hold back the sound. Curling forward, he sunk his teeth into his own arm, nearly breaking the skin and most definitely leaving a large mark. Troy’s thick length was shoving mercilessly inside him in a pounding rhythm that only seemed to stoke the fire inside of him to greater heat. He screamed into his arm as he felt himself being slowly torn apart by the pleasure and the pain. His body trembled, wrapped tightly around Troy’s chest so that their flesh practically melded together. Everything was too much for him. Too much pleasure, too much pain, and he came violently, white lights flashing in his eyes leaving him blind, hanging in the air senseless as pleasure overtook him.

When he came back to himself he felt warm still, but at a more tolerable level. His body was tingling and didn’t want to seem to want to respond properly. There was a wetness between his legs and behind him, the feeling of Troy still buried inside of him, and the sound of both of their panting breaths, as well as a dizzying sense of exhaustion.

He couldn’t move, so he let Troy disengage them and clean them off. There was a large white stain on the front of Troy’s shirt and the painter stripped the shirt off as soon as he pulled up his pants. Connor leaned weakly against the wall as Troy dressed him, removing Connor’s shirt and trading it for Troy’s own even though Connor’s clothing was very tight on Troy’s larger form. Gently, Troy settled his dazed lover on the floor and covered him in Connor’s forgotten jacket.

With a parting kiss on the forehead, Troy unlocked the door. “Wait here a sec, darling, while I grab my coat and then I’ll take you home.”

Connor was asleep before Troy walked out the door.

*****

Troy watched quietly as his lover slowly walked into the kitchen, wearing only one of Troy’s larger t-shirts. The shirt came half-way down Connor’s thighs, short sleeves exposing the large black-and-blue mark near his elbow. Connor blinked at him sleepily, wincing slightly as he stretched. Troy watched appreciatively as the movement brought the shirt hem closer to Connor’s hips, though not fully uncovering him. It was enough to send his mind wandering into thoughts of other things than his morning coffee.

Troy gently brushed the hair away from the boy’s face as Connor joined him at the kitchen counter. Leaning down, he very gently kissed the cut on Connor’s lip. “How are you feeling, sweetling?”

Connor yawned as he settled into Troy’s arms. “Sore, but good.”

Troy smiled evilly. “Want me to kiss it and make it better?”

Connor’s chocolate eyes opened wide. “Troy! No!”

Heedless of his lover’s protests, Troy quickly spun his lover so that Connor was braced against the counter, lifting the back of Connor’s shirt to place a kiss lightly on each cheek before stroking the firm globes.

“Troy, I can’t. It hurts.”

With a slight bit of disappointment Troy changed his mental plans and pulled away. He spun Connor back around to face him, kissing the worries away from his lover’s face. Troy cradled his love in his arms, delighting in the light blush that covered Connor’s face. “Last night was worth it though, wasn’t it?”

Blushing more, Connor nodded. The boy still had problems being forceful and open about sex. He rarely ever initiated anything more than a kiss, perferring instead to restrain himself and let Troy take the first step.

Troy hugged the boy tighter, pressing them close together. “So what made you so frisky last night?” He was extremely curious about what had prompted Connor’s wild actions last night. He was also curious as to what he could do to make Connor act like that again.

Connor blushed beet red and hid his face in Troy’s shoulder, no doubt very embarrassed about having sex in such a public place. “I think it was the chocolate’s fault.”

Troy looked down at his lover in surprise. “The ones you were eating last night before the movie?”

Connor nodded.

If Connor had looked up he would have seen a very smug and happy Troy. “You bought aphrodisiac chocolates?”

“They were a free sample. I didn’t know. Some strange salesman dressed like an angel came to the door last night and gave them to me.”

“Did he leave a card?”

Connor pulled away and fetched the card for Troy.

“Warning: Chocolates contain a strong aphrodisiac.” Troy read from the back of the card, his eyebrows raised in amusement.

“That wasn’t there before. I swear!” Connor spluttered.

Troy’s lip quirked in a smile. “So it just magically appeared?”

Blushing fiercely, Connor shut up. Troy chuckled. This was just too amusing. He checked the box with a wicked grin. Good, there were still seven pieces left for him to force Connor to eat. “Did the winged guy say where to get more?”

“Troy!” His lover was the picture of embarrassed shock.

Troy smiled devilishly. “Well? Did he?”

After a few moments of nervous stuttering, Connor gave in. “They’ll send more for filling out the survey on their website.”

With a happy grin Troy pulled Connor over to the computer desk, seating himself and planting a half-naked Connor on his lap. He navigated to the Heavenly Delights website and opened the survey.

“Go ahead, fill it out.”

Connor half-turned and looked at Troy, no doubt feeling very self-conscious. “But…”

Troy made a shooing motion with his hands and began to read ahead. “Go on. You’re the one that ate them.” He wrapped his arms around his lover’s thin waist and watched the computer screen from over the younger man’s shoulder.

Blushing, Connor started to fill out the survey. The first four questions were just about the taste and the packaging. The fifth question, however, really jumped out at Troy.

5. Did you enjoy the sex that followed eating the chocolates?

Connor coughed as he reached that question. The radio buttons below the question gave five options: ‘yes’, ‘very much’, ‘extremely’, ‘immensely’ and ‘oh god!’. Connor chose the last one, blushing furiously as he did so.

“That good huh?” Troy smiled wickedly, very pleased with himself.

Connor nodded, red as a tomato.

“Want some chocolate?”

Troy got an elbow in his chest for the suggestion, though not with much force behind it. “I promise to make it hurt less next time. I’ll keep a tube of lube on me at all times.” He was chuckling loudly at this point. Connor was squirming in his lap, a very pleasant sensation.

Troy kissed his way up his lover’s neck as Connor ignored him and went back to the survey.

6. Did they heighten your sexual pleasure?

Yes.

7. Did they lower your inhibitions?

Yes.

8. How did they make you feel?

Connor typed ‘warm, fuzzy, dizzy, and very good’ in the textbox. Troy had been reading ahead and decided it would be better to answer the last three questions for Connor. But first he needed to distract his lover.

Grabbing the boy’s chin, he turned Connor to face him and claimed pliant lips, tilting Connor’s head so that Troy could still see the computer screen. His free hand reached out and quietly opened the web camera program on their computer, setting it to record and hiding the window. He’d been waiting weeks to get Connor in this spot and he wasn’t about to waste the opportunity. His hand moved from the computer to Connor’s knee, gliding upward slowly as he opened his lover’s legs wide across his lap. Hitching Connor’s borrowed shirt up over the boy’s stomach he began a series of light gliding strokes over Connor’s member. The boy moaned into Troy’s mouth, the blonde’s tongue imitating his hand’s strokes against the roof of Connor’s mouth. Connor’s hips lifted slightly in reaction to each firm touch of Troy’s hand. Troy released the boy’s chin so that he could finish the survey.

9. Would you like to receive information about buying more chocolates?

Yes.

10. Where should we ship the free chocolates to?

Troy typed his name and address into the box provided. Connor’s hips were bucking up into Troy’s hand, legs spread wide over the sides of the chair. Troy released Connor’s mouth to nibble on the boy’s exposed neck, causing Connor’s head to fall back against Troy’s shoulder with his eyes closed tight. Kiss swollen lips parted for breathy moans, voice hitching every time Troy did something particularly pleasant.

11. Any comments, questions, or complaints?

Do they come in extra strength?

With a strangled cry, Connor came into Troy’s hand. Troy clicked the ‘submit’ button on the website before Connor could come to his senses and read what Troy had answered. Survey out of the way, Troy turned his fill attention to the content youth in his lap. Now that the boy was relaxed and sleepy, it wouldn’t be hard for Troy to sneak a piece or two of chocolate into Connor’s mouth.

Aug 27 2004

[Beauty] The Meaning of Art

Connor didn’t really understand art. It was all too abstract for him. Sure, he got their decorative value. Pretty pictures to hang on the wall were perfectly normal. But he didn’t understand what made one piece better than another. As he walked down the austere hallway, half-heartedly reading the little bronze plaques that hung under each piece listing the painter, the title and when it was made, he knew he was missing most of the experience of being here. That’s why he came.

Troy didn’t know he came here. He would probably never know he came here because Connor sure as hell wasn’t going to tell him that he’d been to an art gallery. But he came, sometimes once a week, sometimes more or less depending on his mood and how things were going. He wasn’t here because he had any interest in the subject. Really, he had no clue beyond what little he’d managed to pick up from the books he read in the university library between classes. He never checked them out, he just took them from the shelves and read a bit before putting them back when it was time to go to class. Even if he read every book in the library he doubted he would understand.

Art was abstract. He was beginning to think that was the entire point of it. You can’t eat it. You can’t gain sustenance off of it, unless of course you’re the painter and then, if you’re lucky, you make enough to support a lavish penthouse and upkeep for yourself and your lover and can afford just about anything that catches your whim. Hell, a really good painter could do all that and foot the full bill for his lover’s university expenses. He had once mentioned paying it back and then completely forgot after Troy had then fallen out of his chair laughing and wouldn’t stop for five minutes. But Connor wasn’t quite sure what made someone a good painter.

From what he’d seen of ‘good’ art, it had no meaning, no purpose. The images didn’t exist like he or Troy or anyone else did, though in some cases they were meant to represent real things. It was strange sometimes, seeing himself on canvas, because it was almost him and then not at the same time. And there’s nothing concrete about art, no set guideline to separate real art from someone’s piled trash. It was just art and you were supposed to know it when you saw it without even really knowing what it was you were looking for.

Connor came to a stop in front of one painting, a recent addition. There was a review posted on a podium next to it. He recognized it from the first line. He’d read the article in the library, but Troy had been the first one to show it to him. Normally Troy ignored the critics, but he’d cut out this article, highlighted the one section and stuck it on the fridge for Connor to see. Connor had promptly ripped it off and thrown it away when he got back. But he’d read it later, safely away from Troy because he knew what Troy would say if he knew.

As he looked up at the portrait hanging on the wall opposite him, he remembered everything Troy had done to get him to pose for it. This painting, the very first one of him Troy had ever done, sparked so many emotions inside of him. They’d come so very far from how they were in the beginning. He liked to think he’d grown up along the way. Around him people in the hall stopped and stared at him and the painting. They went unnoticed, not even there to his senses as he read once more the part Troy had highlighted for him.

“Art itself is an experience of beauty. In beauty we find comfort, solace. We are rested. It fills our hearts and in rare instances, like this, we find beauty returned to us. So I thank the respected Mr. Vaughan for sharing with us the beauty that is in his heart.”


 

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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Aug 16 2004

Playing with Kittens

The sound of conversation drifted through the thin walls of the apartment building. Agnes Castera looked up from her magazine, glancing over at the lavender print on the wall as if she could see through it.

The boys were at it again.

“Spike, no.”

“But Xan, love….”

“I said no. I mean it.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I wasn’t trying to be.”

Agnes had gotten used to the pair of voices raised in argument. In the thirty years she’d lived in her apartment she’d never had neighbors quite so… boisterous. The Jones on the other side might as well be dead, all the noise they made. Not like these boys. They were so full of life it seeped through the walls.

“Really, love, it’s not that bad. I mean it’s not like it’ll hurt anything.”

“The kittens excluded?”

“Well, yes, apart from that.”

Agnes’ lips twitched upward involuntarily as she flipped a page. Really, she wondered sometimes what exactly those boys got up to. The way they talked they almost seemed like some kind of villains but she knew that wasn’t true. They were such sweet looking boys. The pair of them couldn’t hurt a fly between them.

Alexander was the sensible one of the pair. He had a steady job, or at least he always left regularly and dressed nice enough to hold a good job. Probably an accountant or, maybe he did something with bookkeeping. He was level-headed enough for it. Smart too, she was sure. Probably had a degree, though he seemed like a local boy. Sunnydale University was still a good university. Maybe he taught there.

“No! It’s disgusting. And morally wrong, but it’s debatable whether vampires have morals so I can’t really hold you to that.”

Spike was the ‘vampire’. Really, it’s silly what those youngsters would think to call themselves next, though the young man certainly put effort into looking the part. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen him out of doors during the daylight, and he was always dressing in black or similar gloomy attire. And that coat of his! If she were his mother, she would have thrown that thing out years ago.

“Aww. That’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me all week.”

“It wasn’t meant as a compliment.”

“I take what I can get. Look, how about I put mine back?”

They were such sweet boys. Helped her carry her groceries up the stairs a couple times. Still, they were a bit odd, but in a town like Sunnydale a person had to expect a little oddness.

“I’m not quite following.”

“I’ll put mine back. Let them free into the wild.”

“I hope you know what you’re talking about, because I sure don’t.”

“The kittens. Every kitten I win will be set free. How’s that?”

Oh, that was it! They were doing some charity event with the local animal shelter. That Alexander boy seemed to do a lot of charity. He was always gone at all hours of the night. He had the look of someone who was always out to save the world, so she figured he must spend a lot of time working for the local charities. Soon they were going to give him a metal, she was sure, for his benefit to the community.

“I’m fairly certain there’s some rule in psychology about not reinforcing bad habits. Besides, what about the rest of the kittens?”

Agnes lost interest in the conversation as she turned the page to find a wonderful article on sprucing up her petunias. They were so lack-luster this year.

“Look, love. Much as I know you hate it, whether I play or not has no real impact on the game. The others will still play poker, and they’ll still use kittens as chips. No way around it. Way I see it, I can be like a savior to them. Go in there, win a bunch of kittens and then save ‘em from being eaten. Might not get ‘em all but they’re doomed anyway, whether I play or I don’t.”

“Can’t you use snakes or something?”

“I don’t see how killing a snake’s any different than killing a kitten.”

“Kittens are cuter.”

“I don’t think that’s very good logic there, love. Besides, I’d never be able to convince the guys to switch. Kittens taste better.”

“Okay, that’s something I really didn’t need to know. Now I’m going to be thinking about kittens next time we kiss.”

“That’s nothing, love. I’ve eaten far worse things than kittens.”

“You really know how to turn a guy on, you know that.”

“I do try. So, about the game?”

“Fine, sure, whatever. As long as you don’t kill the kittens.”

“Of course, this does mean you’ll be responsible for finding me something better to eat.”

“I think that can be arranged. Just no more talking about eating kittens.”

Agnes set the magazine aside, rummaging around in the drawer for a pen. She needed to remember to grab some lemon peel next time she was at the store.

“Anything for you, love.”

A smile lit Agnes’ face as she scratched out her note. They were such sweet boys.

Aug 11 2004

Rivalry

They were rivals, eternal opposites in life. He was dark and the other was light, an inverted reflection of the pieces they drew, and they weren’t meant to have come together like this. But somehow the light drew in the darkness, or maybe it was dark drawing in the light that led them to this place.

Akira stared down, his eyes lidded and his breath heavy as he moved, thrusting his hips forward with stern force. He’d won. He had control. He was the victor. Right now, he was the one leading the game and Hikaru was following him. And it felt divine. His breath came harder, his hips pumping faster into that soft, warm tunnel that welcomed him, felt like home.

He looked down suddenly, eyes opening partway to stare down at the writhing creature of light splayed on the sheets below him. Hikaru, light like his name, shining forth to the dark corners of Akira’s soul. Light was supposed to drive away the demons that haunted him but it only fueled their thirst, and each tiny taste fired his obsession, leaving him craving for more. Hikaru’s hands fisted in the pillow above him, his head thrown back into its feathery softness as he lifted his hips wantonly into each of Akira’s thrusts. He was begging for it, a panoply of noises falling from kiss-stained lips as he asked Akira to take him, harder, faster, please oh please. The only point of contact between them was the joining of their bodies and Akira’s hands, digging tightly into Hikaru’s hips in a hold so possessive it could never be ignored. Hikaru was his now, and he’d won.

And then their eyes met, and he saw light swimming in Hikaru’s eyes. There was something else there as well, and suddenly Akira felt fear creep up his spine in an icy wave.

He’d lost.

“Akira… ai… ai…” Hikaru was on the verge of saying it, his lips opening one more time to gasp out the words. Panic filled Akira and he surged forward, branding himself into Hikaru’s flesh as the words were cut off, strangled into a wordless scream of pleasure. Hot and heavy liquid coursed through him, from him into another, just as he felt wetness splatter on his chest. His lips were pressed closed, eyes squeezed shut while below him Hikaru let the world know as he came.

He was very, very grateful for the thick walls of his apartment.

With a sigh, Akira allowed his body slump forward over his lover. His eyes slipped open to watch as emotions more numerous than the stars flitted across Hikaru’s face in that instant. Then they kissed, a light meeting of lips on lips so much gentler than their earlier coupling. He tasted his name on Hikaru’s lips and sweat and tears, and then Hikaru was kissing him back, inviting him in and giving all of himself over to Akira’s keeping.

He sighed again, let his forehead rest on his lover’s and he looked down at the innocent face below him.

So this was what it was like to have an equal. Here and now, they were the same level, the same person, almost, as they were joined now tighter than he’d thought two beings could ever be. Akira felt a weight lift free of his shoulders and melt away, leaving him light as a feather and as he drifted down to Earth there was a pair of arms to catch him.

Slowly, Akira pulled out, placing a soft kiss on a bare shoulder, an apology for the dark bruises he knew would emerge on Hikaru’s hips. As he settled back into the sheets, he pulled Hikaru with him until he lay partially over Akira’s side. Hikaru looked up him, eyes bright and shining and he smiled the warmest smile Akira had ever seen.

“Akira, aishiteru. Zutto aishiteru.

Hai.” He answered softly. “Wakatta.

*****

“Akira, I love you. I’ll always love you.”

“Yes. I know.”